Friday, September 15, 2006

Today? Not so good...

I'm extremely thankful that the bad days have been have been in teh vast minority lately. Extremely. But I'm having one.
Not one of those universe-is-out-to-spite-me bad days, just a personal one. More internal (emotionally/physically) than anything else.
I feel like crap. I'm frustrated and unhappy about somethings I shouldn't really go into very deeply in a such public forum until I've worked them out with involved parties. I feel terrible about being so disappointed. I feel guilty about becoming resentful even though I have just cause. I don't know where to go from here yet and the appropriate time/situation to talk about it has not yet presented itself. I'm pretty sure I shuold feel so guilty for my honest and well thought out opinions on this. It's starting to take up more and more of my free thinking time though.

I think that's the largest part. Other things are ok. School is going well. I'm not too ill for the most part. (That's saying a lot lately.) My knitting is going pretty well. I don't have much to complain about. I'm not complaining. I'm... crying and lashing out inappropriately. But I'm trying.

I'm not feelin' the current projects this afternoon so I think I'll go sketch on out the plan for my brother's sock. Maybe a couple more washrags as well. I think I need to pick up something to function as a design notebook and maybe some knitting graph paper software.

Hopefully I'll be up to working on some swatches and starting some socks later. I got the boy to bring some of my movies over. He's working tonight so think I'll watch some old favorites and knit a bit later.

Maybe I'll do a bit of schoolwork first. I find accounting surprisingly relaxing, for the most part. The old school do-it-by-hand stuff at least. Honestly, I could do with much of the software work. For taxes it's great but I prefer doing much of the bookkeeping by hand. Of course this is only a reasonable option for small company and personal finance applications but whatever. :P

Anyway, I guess I'll step away from the computer and try to get some other things done. Even if that ends up being a nap. Resless sleep last night. Very odd and somewhat disturbing dreams.


More positivity later, I promise. :)

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