I'm extremely thankful that the bad days have been have been in teh vast minority lately. Extremely. But I'm having one.
Not one of those universe-is-out-to-spite-me bad days, just a personal one. More internal (emotionally/physically) than anything else.
I feel like crap. I'm frustrated and unhappy about somethings I shouldn't really go into very deeply in a such public forum until I've worked them out with involved parties. I feel terrible about being so disappointed. I feel guilty about becoming resentful even though I have just cause. I don't know where to go from here yet and the appropriate time/situation to talk about it has not yet presented itself. I'm pretty sure I shuold feel so guilty for my honest and well thought out opinions on this. It's starting to take up more and more of my free thinking time though.
I think that's the largest part. Other things are ok. School is going well. I'm not too ill for the most part. (That's saying a lot lately.) My knitting is going pretty well. I don't have much to complain about. I'm not complaining. I'm... crying and lashing out inappropriately. But I'm trying.
I'm not feelin' the current projects this afternoon so I think I'll go sketch on out the plan for my brother's sock. Maybe a couple more washrags as well. I think I need to pick up something to function as a design notebook and maybe some knitting graph paper software.
Hopefully I'll be up to working on some swatches and starting some socks later. I got the boy to bring some of my movies over. He's working tonight so think I'll watch some old favorites and knit a bit later.
Maybe I'll do a bit of schoolwork first. I find accounting surprisingly relaxing, for the most part. The old school do-it-by-hand stuff at least. Honestly, I could do with much of the software work. For taxes it's great but I prefer doing much of the bookkeeping by hand. Of course this is only a reasonable option for small company and personal finance applications but whatever. :P
Anyway, I guess I'll step away from the computer and try to get some other things done. Even if that ends up being a nap. Resless sleep last night. Very odd and somewhat disturbing dreams.
*sigh*
More positivity later, I promise. :)
Friday, September 15, 2006
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